Page 83 - DSOC201_SOCIAL_STRUCTURE_AND_SOCIAL_CHANGE_ENGLISH

Social Structure and Social Change

Notes Diagram Showing Marital Adjustment

Illusions of Marriage

Disillusionment

Covert Conflicts

Overt Conflicts

Resolving Conflicts

by

Insight Proper Communication Considering Marital Happiness
as a State of Mind
The resolving of conflicts depends upon insight, proper communication, and considering conflicts as
normal. ‘Insight’ refers to the feeling which the partner develops pertaining to his/her own behaviour
and that of his/her spouse. One quickly recognizes the consequences of one’s action and takes to
behaviour that lessens the hurt and fear. The more insightful partner soon influences the other partner
by making some sacrifices and giving more importance to other’s interests and needs. ‘Proper
communication’ is ‘talking problems’ freely and frankly with the spouse so that he/she ‘understands’
rationally and compromises and co-operates. Lastly, one has to learn to live in the world of ‘reality’
and understand that happiness is a state of mind and success of marriage depends upon ‘give and
take’ attitude. All these stages in the marital adjustment may be shown diagramatically as above:
A well-adjusted marriage is one in which the two partners: (i) demonstrate affection for each other
externally, (ii) have mutual confidence in each other, (iii) attempt to share common interests, (iv)
husband helps his wife in household chores and children’s care, and wife loves and respects husband’s
parents and siblings, (v) respect each other’s aspirations, (vi) give importance to each other’s role
commitments, and (vii) care for each other’s loneliness and miserableness.
In short, marital adjustment depends upon:
• Age at marriage and social maturity of partners.
• Availability of money for gratification of basic needs.
• Differences in social and educational background.
• Capacity of sacrifice.
• Nature and temperament of in-laws.
• Spouse’s potentiality of changing habits.
• Size of husband’s family.
• Security and stability of occupation.
• Mutual desire and care for children.

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